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| The Golden chicken award for being chicken! |
The Piolet
D'or reached an unprecedented low, just to surprise you. An award that is
supposed to recognize ability and adventure in the mountains was given to all
six candidate teams, despite the fact that there were very clear differences.
Gold is a heavy metal heavier than lead but this years axe will sink in my
memory hopefully never to surface.
What exactly is this award about? Its not about
money, the award is fairly worthless in itself, its clearly not about the
hardest route as every year there are ascents in it that complete amateur
novices are capable of. So what is it about, is it just the sham, the shizzle,
the Oscars for the climbing sponsors, or the make news we now have in an
industry and a sport bereft of excellence.
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| Piolet and Poulet are similar words, one is an axe, one is a chicken. |
This year there were some at least interesting
ascents which due to their diversity might have made judging a bit problematic,
problematic but not impossible surely. The diversity could be simply summed up
by me, as to judge between a somewhat technical modern ascent by the Russians,
and a fairly stout plod up a very long ridge. If I seem patronising I am not, I
just want to keep it simple. And I think it is actually that simple.
The Russians should have won, and the long plod up Nanga Parbats long
ridge should have come second, and very neatly you would have been
rewarding the diversity of climbing. If one were really to have been a bit more
honest the outstanding ascent of the year was the free ascent of Cerro Torre by
young Lama, an ascent that is in the modern idiom. This ascent of the Iconic Tower
was merely mentioned, fairy odd, but then this award is odd, full stop. You might
say giving these awards is difficult, well of course it is, but either give them
to the best ascents, or give them away for smiling white teeth, and being
bloody blonde. I might as well take it one step further and just say for the
last few years a certain Swiss alpinist is fairly clearly king of the mountain.
Will he ever do the great climb, the golden climb, that his abilities merit?
Probably not as it not a Piolet d'or he is fishing for, but a bucket of money. Which Swiss am I talking about? Do you know? The Piolet d'or seems morally as well as monetarily bankrupt to me, but perhaps
it is simply meaningly moronic in a sport that no longer recognizes excellence
and simply fills pages with so called news, or fills halls with punters who know very
little about climbing with a Piolet. Just lately a young German boy caused
ripples when he flashed an 8C+/ 9a, when it should have been a Tsunami that he
might have been able to financially surf to new heights. Instead it gets
swamped in also ran kinda news, our sport is pathetic, but not some of its
participants, they are and always will be golden.
Kurt
Diemberger got the life time achievement award as he should, something
he was over qualified for by his first ascent of two of the 8000 meter peaks.
Imagine two first ascents on two of the big 14, clearly outstanding! A very
easy award that one, but things aren’t always easy, no sir, but you don't just
give up like these judge did, do you, otherwise you wouldn't have become climbers in
the first place. Shame on you judges, and shame on you Piolet d'or.
Two people resigned from the Piolet d'Or, and no wonder!
There is the Piolet d'OR award and there is the Golden Piton award, and word on the street, is that there is a new award in the offing. It's called the Butt plug of Gold, and it is to be awarded for the most tight assed sport in the world, a sport where most of its best performers are below the poverty line.
