I'm a woman

I'm a woman
Photos copyright Laurence Gouault
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TRAINING


Here a list of training articles....


Training Motivation, by Stevie Hurricane Haston


You can read all you like about training, bibles worth of routines, written by the purple robed high priests of training doctrine, and it wont do you the slightest bit of good. That’s how they make their money, one such guru boasted to me, that he earned 300 ...SEE MORE.......


       


 Pull ups, and their variations. By Stevie spicy Haston.


Pull ups are a great exercise, one of the best, combined with a push type exercise ie basic floor push up, and a bit of running, you can become very fit. That’s the end of the story. But of course it isn’t, not if you want to argue, not if you are a nerd, and not if you want to take it a bit further.

The basic pull up, is a palms away...SEE MORE...

 

 

Fingers, by Stevie ‘two fingers’ Haston.

                         
When Big Malc Smith was asked about what training to do for climbing, the answer was always going to be short given his taciturn Scottish nature. What came out was the almost lyrical ‘Fingers, fingers, fingers’, next line according to me, ‘Hubble at eighteen’, and then ‘never been seen’ last line. Just my little joke...SEE MORE... 


Cross Press ups, by Stevie Cross Haston



The cross press up is just a press up with a side twist, it seems to make a nice combo. The way I work it is  I do one press up and twist to one side(keep knee straight and pull your navel in), then...SEE MORE...








Warm up Routine, by Stevie Haston.


 Warm up, or pre climb, is a weird and misunderstood process. If you do it wrong, and most do, including me from time to time, it can do you no good at all, or worse affect your subsequent ....SEE MORE....





Real training and real climbing standards, by Stevie Haston



Not having a great few weeks, the training is going slooooooow.
That’s what training does-it goes sloooow. But this slow time has at least giving me time to think, and re-think. I have with a bit of thought re arranged my finger board set ups, which are helping my Shoulder Impingement, this is a great success, and I advise people....SEE MORE.... 




The core of Climbing by Stevie Amardillo HASTON


The core is a much publicized part of the body, but really misunderstood. I will add to that misunderstanding by giving you some stuff that you won't follow, or try ...SEE MORE....









I always wanted an expensive train set, I never got one. I always wanted to play music really well, never could. ...SEE MORE....









TRAINING FOR LIFE N°3


Training for life goes on for a long time-hopefully! Training should just go on and on, because if you don’t you will start to loose nearly all of your very hard earned gains. What you gain in five months, will be gone in five weeks. There is a tiny bit of good news for the inveterate serial couch potato laying within all of us. The news is, if you have had it before and lost it, you should be able to get it back and a little bit....SEE MORE...





  
Training for life , N° 2. 





So you now want to train! You have made your mind up, you have girded your loins, you are ready to perspire. You have been inspired by great climbers, and great routes, and you want desperately to improve. So the first lesson is, it aint going to be easy, and it aint gonna be a short ride. If you want the ‘abbs in...SEE MORE...








Training for most British climbers seems to be anathema, almost as if it’s the antithesis of the sport. Training in other places seems better excepted.  But for many training is definitely not cool,  and of course its way too much work.  Training is a bad word, not sporting,...SEE MORE... 


Three versions same climber?  



This article was published in a mag...
In sport they told you that there were three different body types. The body types were Mesomorph, Ectomorph, Endomorph, and these three types of body, were supposedly standard types of shape which would affect your suitability for different sports. Interesting but incorrect, some shapes....SEE MORE....  








Transitional climbing, Stevie the tranny Haston.



At the moment my climbing is in a ‘Spring time’ fizz of growth, its easy and natural. I am not 55; I am 5 months old, I cant walk so I crawl, If I cant crawl I roll, I just do what it takes. Because I had a year off I am weak, the old raging bull...SEE MORE...




5 minutes training plan, versus the 5 years plan, by Stevie the train Haston.


Now if you were wise you would go for the five years plan. But hey who is wise, and who is Swiss.

So this morning I instigated the 5 minutes plan. Me and my training buddy, who is a trainer and coach; argued about it, and we decided to try it. We are both in a hurry....SEE MORE.......



Doing the Bug , by Stevie Scarabe Haston.





This Exercise complex is mine, but I give it to you, be grateful!...SEE MORE...







Shoulder Impingement in climbers, by Stevie Haston

Shoulder Impingement is very common in climbers, and will ruin your climbing and training. What can you do?


First off, if you do the wrong thing, you will make things worse. Wrong things to do; are see a doctor who hasn’t got a clue, likewise a bad physio, or indeed listen to me. If you are an American and a Doctor...SEE MORE....






More on Shoulder Impingement in climbers, by Stevie Haston





Looks like we have a lot of climbers out there with problems. First I am a climber not a Doctor, perhaps you should see a very, very good Doctor. Personally the idea that anybody knows more about my body than I do is absurd, but hey you might have one of those standard...SEE MORE....







Grippers by Stevie ‘the claw’ Haston.





Tools of the trade



Hand Grippers have been for about 100 years, but most people dismiss them. I think they are fun, and they can help with hand strength, so why not...SEE MORE...






Training problems and expectations by Stevie Haston


Training for climbing is a royal pain, unless you keep your objectives simple. It’s a Royal with cheese, if your expectations are too high.
A few months ago, I had a very good result in ...SEE MORE...




Arab Spring Exercise, by Stevie Inshallah Haston.


Here's a crafty bit of exercising. Sorry about the gnome outfit, but hopefully you will understand the photos. People are continually arguing about specific exercises like...SEE MORE....







Bench marking, by Stevie Haston


Bench Marking some personnel bests is always a good idea. Bench Marking allows you to know if your slack in one department, and tells you to get back up there. One of the best bench marks for climbing is simply your weight, if you...SEE MORE...








Auburn autumn aria, by Stevie 'audax et cautus' Haston

Had a fantastic little days climbing, perfect conditions, perfect light. It was about six degrees, low humidity, rested, keen, eager to see what the day, and our bodies would give. It was good, I would say brill, but no chain, no victory, just progress, and a feeling of bold cautiousness.
The lesson of today, was hurry slowly. I am always full of good advice but...SEE MORE...







Being clever, being strong, succeeding.by Stevie unsuccessful Haston

Training with fingers injury, clever or stupid!
Being clever, being strong, succeeding, are not what I normally do. I am normally firmly in neutral, not working anything out, not specifically training, and not succeeding because I don't try very hard! I do have occasional success, because I get soooo pissed off with myself...SEE MORE...










Making Monsters, by Stevie normal Haston

Making monsters is what its about, but in the end monsters devour themselves, or just rip themselves apart. I did it just over a year ago running in a 200 mile run, half way I slightly tore a calf, but of course I continued for a while and made it much worse. In climbing you don't have the luxury of even time to consider, it happens very quick. Above is standing or upright row, its very good for shoulders, you really...SEE MORE...







Learning to Love, by Stevie Haston


Learning to love my 20 kg plate didn't take long, but as with any kinnda man, there's  different kinds of love, from the slight flirt, to deeeep.....SEE MORE... 













Having fun while injured, by Stevie Haston



This one is for Jurgen, who just had his Patella out and missed a comp. Notice the Panda....SEE MORE...







The truth about women, by Stevie Haston



This blog piece is going to be too good for this blog. It should be in a magazine but of course magazines are failing to do any kind of job. Blogs are just blogs so can't fail, Andrew Bisharat take note. Women on the other hand don't fail, they succeed, they succeed more......SEE MORE...







Training the progression and progressing the training, by Stevie locomotive Haston


This is my non-climbing wife burning me off on the 6 millimeter edge, 18 secs! She has been training, and very well indeed, but not for long! She has always amazed me, but at the moment, I am going to slow her down. And I am going to slow...SEE MORE.... 












Tolerating pain, by Stevie Haston




Too much pain to train my back, plus no mojo. Anyway pain is there for most of us, its in not giving it, and trying to ignore it that we gain. .....SEE MORE....












Injury, inspiration, infinity, by Stevie Haston


I am injured, more than usual, but I train. I fell off going for it on a project and took a twisting fall, hurt my back. Couldn't really do much for a few days, today 1000 pull ups. It is not as Nietzsche said, 'what does not kill you makes you stronger', rather...SEE MORE.... 







Levers and one arm day, by Stevie Haston

So, I am still massively weak, but its getting better. Summer is here and its bad for small holds etc, don't care anyway, cos the plan is the plan, stick to the plan, man!One arm on a comfy mono thread, and then extend, at the moment its rubbish hope to have made a bit of progress in a few months and after cutting off my legs.....SEE MORE...












Yoga helps climbing, by Stevie Haston


Yoga helps climbing, well what a shock! But some people don't get it, Yoga helps everything, Yoga is more than stretching, yep it is the way thru life.....SEE MORE...





Bite the Bullet, not the pillow? by stevie Haston.

Are you feeling lazy?

To Train or not to Train
that is the problem
whether it is nobbyer in the mind to suffer
the stings of outrageous failed redpoint attempts
or to take up heavy wieghted finger pull ups.....SEE MORE....





This cheered me up, by Stevie up Haston



First recorded muscle up with an egg on a spoon, grade font 8A


Yesterday I did my little thing about Jean Pierre Bouvier, AKA the Fly. Two big web sites failed in their inept ways to even copy paste things correctly, bravo, 8a.nu and UKC. Then there was a lot of discussion of whether it was important, or even allowable, or whether he had ...SEE MORE...





Sore elbows, Pull-ups and climbing by Stevie Haston






Training with Mates, by stevie antisocial haston.



Satan gets a little help from his friends

 Trained with Laurence today, she didn’t want to, but I made her, cos I needed it. Yesterday I ran up my hill in the rain, which turned to snow in a strong unhelpful gale. The hill is steep rugged and dangerous, it is 1200 meters of up, I say this not to impress but to underline how much...SEE MORE...








Training reality check by stevie the slouch haston.




Yesterday I had a bad day, I did three 8’s. What's so bad about that, well lots of things, I am running our of time and money, and my body is getting old, and worn out. I need two small operations

I have just finished a 10 week climbing trip and am weaker than when I started! I don’t like feeling weak. One of my old projects humiliated me, it kinda always does....SEE MORE....





Man I am Psyched, by Stevie Psycho Haston.

Tools of the trade


I got 10 weeks of new routing ahead of me, I am buzzing already.
Got mail from mates who are training, it’s keeping me Motownvated,
Got up at 5am to do my 1000, easy peasey, then an old mate came round, used to do the Competition thing years ago, he wanted an assessment, you know like an Mot (don’t know the US term), anyway it was really fun, he was so poor in so many areas! But man, his crimp strength! We had a great day, except I had to do a bit of stuff with him,....SEE MORE...





1000 pull ups, by Stevie Haston

Tools of the trade; pull up station, carpet, music is optional.
It’s raining, or snowing, or something disagreeable. My partner is sick so I don’t want to drag her ....SEE MORE...








Yoga climbing, by Stevie novice Haston.

 The Yoga breathing is working for the climbing, but its not working so well for my swimming, phooee! The problem with my climbing now is that I am relatively weak. The Yoga has worked because it has maximised my potential....SEE MORE...









Zee Mystery of climbing, by Stevie the sage Haston.

In 6 weeks I haven’t really been climbing but I managed 8a+ today. How is it possible? Some years I tried fairly hard, and never made it past 8a+, what is going on? I guess I am very fit, both Cardio wise and in a muscle sense, but this seems too good to be true. For the last 10 years I have been thinking that climbing is quite complex, but in some ways...SEE MORE...