I'm a woman

I'm a woman
Photos copyright Laurence Gouault
No reproduction on other media without the photographer's permission.

Friday, 17 January 2014

Gelatinous truth, solid lies, by Stevie Turgid Haston.

                   The film Mr Woodcock

I have been catching up on culture lately. Yea, that's right-been chowing down the pop corn and watching the flickering screen. Australian culture was once compared to the mould on half eaten yogurt, but now that yogurt is made with more preservatives than a horny army on leave, well we are lost for words. American culture has finally produced a decent film, it is advertised as a comedy but is actually a climbing instructional tutorial. 

Anyway I have been compared to Billy Bob Thorton, I dont know whether to be flattered or appalled. But in the spirit of Bob, and Bob, and Bob, lets call them the holy trinity of Bobs, climbing media is a "gelatinous embarrassment" , and needs a good thrashing. So thats Billy Bob, Bob Marley, and Bob the Boobs in Fight Club.

If I hear the certain climbers described as dirt bags ever again by advertisers I will promise to swallow my silver plated dummy. Most of them are well off, some of them are trustafarians, and more than a few are millionares, so get real. And another thing, UKC Forum is not a forum, it is a device to construct interest in a business which makes money, customer beware! It took off a thread about the cruelties of down production this week, stating that it wasnt well thought out- as my father Bob Hastons would have said, 'eat wet horse manure, it's good for you' , saying that live down plucking is cruel is just bad for selling duvets, that's all.