Adrift in a sea of rock, by Stevie Safe Haston.

 ffffffA friend comes over from London and asks for a refresher on certain techniques, 'advanced, mediocre or just plain nonsense' I ask.

So you can teach abseiling very easily, I just did it infact to a English international footballer, anyway. What kind of test, small cliff, large cliff, loose as Feck cliff , a cliff where if you fail to get down and get back up again you are down there until the fishes consume you kinda cliff?

So the teacher abseils into the sea because its a bit steep at the bottom so even he has to pass the swimming while overloaded with gear sea landing! This was funny, I have sense of humour, perhaps not yours, perhaps I won't get many people asking for testing, but until you abs into the sea while overloaded with gear you dont really appreciate how hard it is, for some the 'failures it will prove impossible!

This is my student arriving with my fins and mask, it was a very select place to swim for an hour! If you look closely he is abseiling with a protection prussic knot, this is good he got points for this. He lost points for the bag being on his back it should have been clipped between his legs to stop him being tipped backwards. I abseiled with out the extra safety, why (?) because I was going to be in the water and might need to get off the rope quick time.

The student is in the middle of the photo, you can see his hello helmet if you look very close.

6 meters below the top, student is all smiles. I had heard a few swear words floating up earlier, I did not mark him down for these.

The sun was going down as the student topped out, I think and he said he had learnt a few things. I should hope so, rope work, safe abseiling, safe Jumaring are critical skills, you may learn the principle on a few meter high rock or tree, but you need to do something a little bit harder and a little bit more punishing of your mistakes. Experience is not gained at the bouldering wall, and I am not knocking climbing walls but you know I speak the truth, the trick is of course surviving your experience, or your apprenticeship. 

Querganger, the route you do with pride, by Stevie Straight Haston

 Today I went climbing, there was a Gaypride march on the tiny island but I thought I would strut my stuff like the true YMCA guy I am by putting up a new route-Querganger! Querganger means traverse in German by the way, and this is a 45 meter traverse to a hanging belay followed by a 15 pitch to the top.

24 quickdraw, and its incredible rock, its gritstone like or very rough sandstone, it will provide a lovely deep water solo for the young of heart but needed a little cleaning by this old man. Alex hadn't really done a proper horizontal traverse before so she was in full German swearing mode.

There was a big flock of very big Barracudas for a while but sadly they got chased off by a speed boat and there were also fried Egg jellies fish floating around eerily. It was fairly somber down there under big over hangs and we weren't sure how to get off if we messed it up. I guess we would just have untied and jumped off!

The last little pitch is a very nice 6a+, which felt hard today, delicate with sore toes, very little pride as I didn't dance up it but moaned and twitched, overwieght and out of practise on such a fine bit of climbing as Queerganger, did I say 24 clips, good holds except for two sections of little crimps and friction stuff for the feet. It will be in the new guide book, coming soon to Malta and Gozo.

The new Guide book to Maltese climbing, by Stevie Haston.

 So guys I have given up really on doing blogs as most people just can't be bothered to read for 5 mins at a time, but here goes. Simon Alden and Stephen Farrugia from the Maltese climbing Club came over to kick start the drive to get the new guide book going, although of course they have been doing slow progressive work for years. Before I get started and you go to sleep let's have a photo.

This is the top of Bernadino, the route is named after a friends grandfather executed by Franco. Its 5+, 5+, 6c, 6a+.

Now then you obviously know we are in the middle of a heat wave thingy, world war 3 and every body has personal problems and life necessities going on, but guys listen climbing is great, the cliffs are not a Tic Toc nonsense, they are real throbbing fear and pleasure!

This route is the Last White Rhino, it was meant to be a club classic but has yet to see an ascent by the club guys!!!! Why are my club members more relaxed then the Jamaican Bobsled team? The above are just two routes that will go in the new guid book that is the work of club members, climbers from all over Europe and a few very dedicated guys, one of whom cuts the path in Xini valley twice a month and does other stuff apart from introducing kids and grown ups to climbing-his name is Didi! The Last White Rhino is a kinda Gozo/Maltese Via Ferrata, its an abseil, then a great pitch on bronze rock 5+, then a slab under a roof, then some aid up an overhanging wall, 6a A2, then a top pitch at 6a and A1 or 7c+, be my guest do it how you likes much aid as  you like its for fun. Life is for fun.    

This route is in the old guide but there are a lot of new routes on this side of the magic island of Gozo, a few new cliffs which have some crazy new routes.

This is the last pitch of Bernadino, my mate Solly lead this pitch this day and was a very long time in doing so, I followed up with much relief as I knew Alex would be at the top ready to take me home, I needed beer! At the start of the day me and Solly had swum under the cliff which is huge, a May Day but water cold enough to shrink the gonads which are bit necessary on the route, please forgive me if I am not using the approved 2022 word speak, intestinal fortitude perhaps, anyway a cracking  huge pitch. I was trying to get Simon and Stephan to do this route as they are proud of their islands routes, but this one is a bit spicy etc.  Today Simon and I ran around the island taking photos and trying to sort out ideas as to how to describe some routes, as some routes are over protected, some are normal, and some spicy etc, naturally as I come from an age a long time ago when spicy hot was good but today some people get a rash just thinking about getting their feet above a bolt this all required some talking. Feed Back from the Maltese climbing community might be welcome, address your comments to Simon, he is nicer than me!

This is Alex waving a beer at Solly, Solly is due for an operation we wish him luck etc.
Simon and Stephan and I visited a few new cliffs today trying to nudge my brain into remembering new routes. We went to Fruit Cake land as there are about 20 new routes to put in, and I couldn't believe how good this area is! The climbs range from 5+ to 8b+ on natural gear, and are on sandstone, it's and area with brilliant routes with a 15 meter approach. Anyway that's it, I am 4 beers to the wind and if you can't be bothered to read or dream about climbing it is not my fault. A new guide book is coming, it will be very good, the world is shrinking into even something that Orwell or Huxley wouldn't recognise but climbing is still there, its the answer, its the way! 

Here you go Solly, this is for you, this is for everybody who has climbed with me, this is for all the kids and old people I have introduced to climbing. I felt a bit proud recently, as its my 10 year taking people climbing here, from magazine people and film people to little kids, hope I have a bit more in the tank.